Conflict is part of our lives. The way we manage it greatly impacts the strength of our relationships. Having strong communication skills is essential to effectively navigate challenging conversations.
When conflict arises, it’s vital you mitigate the situation as quickly as possible regardless of who is at fault.
How Emotional Intelligence Supports Successful Relationships
Did you know that your success in managing relationships is correlated to your level of emotional intelligence? When we are aware of our emotions and those of others, we can build and manage relationships more successfully, while mitigating conflict.
The following three skills are core competencies of emotional intelligence:
- Self-Awareness - We use our self-awareness skills to notice our feelings and judge if our needs are being satisfied.
- Self-Management - As we become more self-aware we use our self-management skills to express our feelings and act accordingly to benefit our relationships.
- Social Awareness - Our social awareness skills help us understand other people’s needs and feelings.
Repair Conflict in Real Time
Here’s the thing, when communication breaks down, the quicker you resolve the conflict, the easier it will be to repair the relationship. You never want to leave a broken or conflicted conversation without repairing it. Undeniably, it’s far more effective to resolve a situation when you’re face-to-face in the moment, rather than afterward when one or both individuals are simmering over the conflict.
Embrace Conflict Resolution by Getting out of Your Comfort Zone
Recently, a client shared that he struggled to manage conflict with his colleagues. He stated how difficult it was to develop the necessary confidence to move past a conflict-inducing conversation and resolve it. He instinctively wanted to escape the conflict as quickly as possible, rather than facing his combatant while trying to repair the situation in the moment. He like many, found it easier to walk away from the stress caused by conflict, however, he learned over time that it served him much better to embrace the situation and get out of his comfort zone to fix the conflict as it occurred.
It’s encouraging to know that being open to change and trying something out of the ordinary can often make life easier!
5 Ways to Resolve a Conversation Ending in Conflict
The following strategies will support resolving a broken conversation or conflict to maintain and nurture relationships:
- Self-manage to get your emotions under control.
- Consider what you are contributing to the conflict.
- Forget about who is responsible for the conflict – to move forward you need to let it go!
- Focus on what you need to say or do to repair the communication or situation.
- Work toward common ground by calmly and empathetically asking how the person you’re interacting with is feeling or share how difficult you are finding the conversation.